Tying the Knot on the 2006 Season

From Jessi Prinner.

Hello ABDers,
I'm sad to say it's time to hang up the expensive Zipp racing wheels (I wish) and crawl back into the dark, gloomy caverns to our awaiting trainers. But before I scare you all away with the "T" word, I'll focus on the last savory reminder of racing--the Fall Fling. Starting off the series was the 7-mile TT course, which I placed 2nd in just three seconds behind the leader with a time of 20:11. The next day was the true excitement, though: I got to race with the old men! Let me tell you, the old men may be…uh…old, but they are some FAST folks. In fact with all that "medication" they get, I thought they'd be much faster. Anyway, they were fun to ride with, and not too hard to draft or keep up with. About halfway through the race, some guy attacked and got a good gap on the field, so another guy named Mike Farrell decided to attack also, and bridged up to the guy. Then, several laps later, a mass surge of about five old men leapt from the field, and I jumped with them. Tom Doughty (who was a particularly strong old man) attacked from the small mass with Ben App on his wheel and dropped all the other guys, but I sprinted the gap and bridged up to Ben's wheel. Then, Ben and I, being the lazy vegetables we are, just sat on Tom's wheel and let him chase Mike and Mystery Man up the road. Actually, we didn't want to help Tom catch Mighty Mike, so we just sat on and watched poor Tom suffer in the wind. By the last lap, Mike and Mystery Man were not far ahead in sight, but it was too late, because before we knew it we were all sprinting to the finish, Tom, then Ben, then me not far apart from one another. If I were a 50-year-old man I would have gotten 5th, but since I was just a little 14-year-old girl, I got 1st in the 1,2,3 women's.

The next week I lined up again with the 50+'ers at the road race awaiting the 32 long miles to come. Corie was there, too, so all I could hope for was second. Right from the gun an attack issued. And who was the dumb radish that responded? Me! So after pounding my way pointlessly to catch the break, ol' Radish brains got caught anyway along with the break. And after much thinking I have decided that my excuse for this harebrained chase was that I needed a good warm-up (so nobody better go tellin' my coach about my stupid move `cause then he'll call me a turkey…then I'll officially be "Turkey Radish Brains") Anyway, it was only two laps in the race that I got dropped and lost all hope as I battled uselessly with the wind, alone. Then, miraculously, Bob TT man, came to my rescue and saved me from the treacherous wind…and not once did he want me to pull! Nearing the end of our final lap, we caught a XXX lady who was one of my competitors, and she jumped on my wheel for a free ride, until I out-sprinted her at the finish line. So I got 2nd place behind Corie.

The final crit. arrived all too soon for me. I knew it would prove a very tough race, so I hoped that I might weaken the 50+'ers concentration by stripping on the front line, but it was to no avail, for as soon as the race got underway the old men were faster than ever. A few vicious attacks came, and a breakaway of Tom Doughty and Mike and a bunch of other strong guys got away. One time I hopped on that polish guy's wheel and he almost led me up to the break, but fell short by only several yards. So I resumed to just sit in at the fast pace and sprint I the end to a 1st place in the crit., and a 1st place overall.

Now, there are absolutely way too many ABDers to congratulate in this report, but I will focus on some of the highlights. Two juniors performing very well during the Fling were Mike Redlich jr. fearlessly attempting the citizen men category and Theo Quednau, who was the second highest placing ABDer in the cat 4s! Also: Pat Murphy pulled off a victory in his own 70+ category along with Bryce Mead winning the cat.1,2,3s! Irene Pang and Sherri Richards did awesome as well, sweeping the women's cat.1,2,3s with a 2nd and 3rd. And Mike Farrell did super as always beating up on his old men peers. Great job to ALL ABDers who came and thanks to Ebert & co. for making such an awesome race possible!

`Till next year,
-Turkey-Radish-Brains